VIP movements resulting in the school declaring a holiday on Monday!! Yayy and other similar squeals of excitement erupted from the tween. I sent up a silent hallelujah thanking the heavens for granting me an extra forty winks on a cold winter morning. This was how we wound down the Sunday without Monday morning blues plaguing us.
As a Mom you know that happiness such as this is short lived and all good things come with a price. Egg-jactly!! For the next day was spent trying to first get her out of bed, which was achieved at noon (please those perfect mommy’s whose kids wake up at the crack of dawn out there kindly do not judge this only to human Mother!!) Then began the task of coaxing her into the bathroom to have her shower, Whhhhyyyy Mom!! It’s a holiday!! And it’s sooooo coolllldddd!! All the moaning to test the patience of a saint (which I’m not.) Then the struggle to get her off the various gizmos we indulgent and completely ignorant parents buy when the brat makes her puppy face with promises galore on how she will be more responsible.
“Aaah!” I thought as I settled down with me well earned cuppa of green tea and much needed yet weak vitamin D after lunch (the first meal of the day in the tweens case.)
She saunters into my sanctuary of peace. “Mom, listen!” she goes dramatically, “Here’s a load of research on why we should get a dog.”
As I rolled my eyes at this oft-repeated conversation she carried on unfazed.
“Spending just 15-20 minutes with your dog can help you with managing stress.”
“Who’s stressed?” I ask.
“Uff, listen Mom. Having a dog may help reduce cardiovascular diseases.”
To which a panicked me asks, “Who’s got cardiovascular diseases in the house? Pray tell me!”
All I get is a frown in return for speaking out of turn as always.
“They are a girl’s best friend!” she continues.
“What’s wrong with your human best friend?” I ask concerned, “Did the two of you fight?”
“Moooommmm! Please take this seriously!” she admonishes and reads out more, “Having a dog makes kids responsible!” she looks at me triumphantly, hearing her lack off in that arena almost all day from me.
To which I snort and choke on my tea most unladylike.
“Mom, you know what? The animal rights people should really give you a talking to!”
“And what about Mom rights?” I ask, “Why isn’t there someone talking about those, I wonder.”
“There’s no such thing as Mom Rights!” she informs me very pointedly.
“Then it’s high time we made some,” I say. “The first one is Moms should be allowed to have their tea in peace. Second, Children should obey Mothers without questioning the ways and wherefores in a minimum of three conversations a day. Thirdly, Moms should be allowed weekly offs where children do all the housework and Moms recline in bed.” I’m happily on a roll, ignoring her expression of disbelief.
Just then the teen ambles in, “Feeling hungry, Mom! Where’s my post lunch snack?” Mother’s of 12th grade boys will only understand this creature that studies all day and some strange hours of the night and eats a minimum of 8 meals a day.
I sigh and get moving, peace eluding me yet again. After feeding the teen his after lunch snack I sit down to write this to seek solidarity and a movement, ladies for “MOM RIGHTS!” Who all are with me?